Seriously, Jack-ass? Now, I know on a daily basis I use a table. I take up less than 50% because I have a tiny laptop. This jerk with a full sized laptop is taking the entire table because he has his back pack on it, in stead of in the overhead, and his cup of tea. I figured when I sat down, he would at least move his damn tea. Nope. I finally just pulled out my laptop and said, "Is it possible for me to use at least part of the table?" He looked at me like it was a major inconvenience. All he's doing is watching a movie.

Vintage

If you are going to  keep the mullet, could you at least brush it?

Lady, if you are going to yell "Hold the elevator!" You had better run cuz if I don't get to the platform in time because of you, it will not be a pleasant morning for either of us.

I have decided that since people have no manners on public transit, I am doing away with some of mine. When there are 50 other empty seats and you choose to sit with me, while I am obviously reading a text and taking notes on my computer, and carry on a phone conversation, I will now just start reading about Psychoanalytic Theory out loud. What? Am I disturbing you? Making it hard for you to concentrate? SO SORRY!

Apparently functional WiFi was a one day thing.

Holy shit! The Wifi is working! First time in over a month!

You smell like sweaty arm pits. The fruity body spray is not helping.

Now The Muppet is upset because someone has taken "her spot" in the train station parking lot.

QOTD

"I could take an earlier train and get to work on time, but what would be the point of that?"

Ok, Joe, shouting two aisles to your coworker and continuing to carry on a conversation in this manner is pissing everyone off. The Sheriff on the phone seated with me has given up his call because he can no longer hear over your yap. I, myself, cannot concentrate in Freud and Lacan, so I have had to quit studying. How many others are you going to disturb?

Today it smells like urine and cheap perfume.

The new conductor reminds me of Waldo.

Stashed between the seats.

What is that noise? It's like a weird clicking and popping, over and over and over. Maybe someone is playing a game on their phone. It's pretty common for folks to assume that everyone else wants to listen to their entertainment. Wait - no - three rows away there is a man chewing gum. You must be giving that Bubblicious quite a work out sir, if I can hear you smacking away from here!

Shoving your way in front of an old lady with a cane simply because you are in a hurry is not cool, Sir.

If you want to sit next to me don't stand there, weight slumped over to one foot, hand on hip and elbow akimbo, glaring at me. Open up your damn mouth and speak, or shuffle you scrawny butt along to one of the other multitudes of empty seats.

We just passed a building with a sign nailed to the door that says, "STRESS DEPT." My first thought was, "I'm glad I don't work there." Then I sadly realized, there should be one of those signs on the door to my office.

Lady across the aisle from me is tweezing her upper lip.

Today it smells like pot roast.

Vintage

Put your shirt on. It's not that warm. That lady has a winter hat on. Of course it is not that cold either.

Vintage

Wow, really? You are going to sit down next to me and just kick off your shoes, eh?

Very professional looking woman in a blouse, jacket, and skirt exits the train. I look down and happen to notice, she is not wearing gym shoes as so many women do who have a bit of a walk to work after they reach their stop. She is not wearing flip-flops for comfort and carrying a pair of dress shoes to change into later. She is just simply not wearing any shoes at all.

Working on a new story when I feel the weight of a stranger's eyes. I look across the aisle, and a young man blushes furiously while trying to hide a sketch book. I asked him, "Are you sketching me?" He shakes his head no, blushes again, and shows me my profile. A much nicer one than I see in the mirror.

This woman has her phone cranked and is talking to her daughter on speaker phone. The child is whining about how she needs a new computer to play games on because this one is "So Slow!" Mom just caved and agreed to buy her a new one.

Seriously, TRE? Seriously? We are going on a month with no fucking WiFi. Get your shit together!

Packed to capacity. Standing room only. There is a tiny girl with a gigantic guitar trying to squeeze in. I hope she makes it.

Vintage

It's going to be a long ride - someone has a terrible case of gas.

Today it was standing room only. It was so crowded in fact, that I was stuck in the stairwell. A very tall gentleman was one step above me. This meant that I spent about 15 minutes of the ride with his ass only three inches from my face.

Listen to Pavarotti back there with his headphones on and music turned up so loud he has no idea he is serenading the entire car.

This piece of shit train made such a big to do when they got WiFi. Too bad it hasn't worked in over three weeks. Get your shit together, TRE!

Today we have, not just a finger nail, but a wad of discarded hair as well.

Vintage

What is that stuck to the bottom of my shoe? EWWWWWWWWW!  A used bandaid!!!!!

Look closely, more finger nails.

Conductor just came over the speaker asking for any medical personnel to come assist with an emergency on the platform. A woman was running to the train and missed the step up. It turned out to be The Muppet's friend. The Muppet is now freaking out while we wait on an ambulance. Better call my boss and let him know I will be late.

Ha ha ha. The Muppet is beside herself. About a week ago a "new rider" started sitting in "her" seat. She's been forced to sit elsewhere and is just befuddled.

Sleeping Beauties

A gift from the Nail Clipper

I'll never understand why people think this is an appropriate place to clip their fingernails.

This dude is using the over-head luggage rack to do pull-ups.

Sleeping Beauties

Ug. It is too early for your whistling, sir. Please put a cork in it.